Our advice today comes from Rebecca Serven, one of our wonderful brides of 2014. She shared with us how the wedding planning process not only provided her with great memories to cherish, but it also made their relationship stronger.
The true story of a perfect DIY wedding, from the Bride herself:
The search for the perfect wedding location started as probably some normal wedding venue searches go... my mom and I looking at possible places and reporting back to my fiancé with the options. Dan had told me "what ever I wanted, it's my day." So venturing near and far, taking pictures and notes and asking my questions, I would come home excited about what I found, chattering about what is good and what I thought was bad. Dan was a great sport, listening and viewing the pictures. While I was excited to be searching, I felt something was lacking. It probably took me a couple of venues to realize why I was not satisfied with the progress. There were some beautiful locations and Dan would watch and listen and talk but he was not excited. He was happy to leave the decision up to me. If anyone knows me, making decisions is sometimes not the easiest (though saying YES to the proposal was a piece of cake!).
I realized that I wanted Dan to be excited about the location we decided. So one weekend, I mentioned having the wedding on the farm. Oh boy did I get a response!! Dan immediately started talking about moving farm equipment, concreting the floor in the barn, building a loft, cleaning up the yard, using a field for a parking lot. It was right then and there, that I knew, we were going to have the wedding on the farm, not just any farm, but Our Farm. As soon as we started talking about it seriously, Dan was involved, he was excited, and he knew that this was something we could do well and do together! To have my fiancé looking forward to planning the wedding as much as I was -made it PERFECT!
It was not my wedding, it was not his wedding, it was our wedding and what a better way to start out a marriage than as a team, working for a common goal and accomplishing something that would be ours forever, wrapped in memories of hard work, determination, team work and love.
To say that I have one favorite memory of the wedding day is impossible. To say I have many cherished memories leading up to and including the wedding day is more truthful. Dan and I had a year and a half to prepare for our wedding day by cleaning, digging, building, buying, coordinating and planning so that our home, our farm, was ready. These are the true memories I cherish, going to garage sales for the plates, building the loft, cleaning tables, seeding the parking lot, moving the equipment, working along side family and friends, and knowing that this effort was supported and accomplished by both Dan and I.
So some advice to upcoming brides and grooms:
1. If you can plan your wedding with your fiancé (whether DIY, or just coordinating with a venue), jump at the chance. It creates memories of a lifetime, the importance of your wedding day becomes even more special, and you start to build the foundation for a strong relationship together.
2. If you plan a DIY wedding, remember the details are great, but if you get down to the wire on time, cut them out. People are there to see you and your fiancé get married, not the details. What is completed will be great, and they will never know if there was something "else" you wanted to do!
3. Enjoy the adventure along your way to the wedding day.
4. Number your RSVP cards and coordinate it with a name. Occasionally someone forgets to actually write their name on it as when it is returned.
5. Always remember to have a box in your vehicle, you never know when you will happen upon a great garage sale.
6. A little dirt never killed anyone!
7. Don't be afraid to modify the wedding ceremony, if you don't like something or want to add something. Remember, it is about the two of you!
9. Pictures, pictures, pictures!
10. Don't' stress yourself out. You are not alone - talk to your fiancé.